My Doppelganger!

This is about a curly haired, fair-skinned (but doesn’t endorse it), extremely outspoken and gutsy woman who does not let the idea of what she is expected to be mar her expectation of herself. She owns up to her mistakes and often turns to the voice within her which tells her to hang on when the voices outside become too loud. She tells it like it is, never once lowering her eyes or taking recourse to pauses to concoct a more convenient version of a difficult story. The phrase ‘risk being seen in all your glory’ was as if coined for her. She isn’t easy or saintly by any means; she doesn’t intend to be. For that, she definitely isn’t sorry, no apologies for burning too brightly, you see.

She is Kangana Ranaut. I am Amol Kaur. We are look-alikes (doppelgangers to be more precise). Or so I have been told, so many times over the years, by strangers, acquaintances and peers. She doesn’t know I exist. I know she is for real. But there is more to us (more similarities for sure) than meets the naked eye. Free-spirited and not the ones to be easily slotted, I didn’t mind the comparison. But, I wasn’t particularly besotted with her, until I saw ‘Queen’. And then I saw it again.

Of course, she is a star. But in my own galaxy, I am no less. And a certain level of madness is a given, if you have to shine like one. Madness, contrary to what most of us think, is imperative if one has to grow, evolve and stand alone when people around you are acting like sheep. You have to wipe your tears, learn your lessons, and march on.

Kangana is what she is today because she refused to become a mannequin or a mere eye/arm candy. She has not let her gender, diction, atypical appearance dictate her dreams. She has played characters that are not only difficult but has spearheaded a movement which has allowed actresses of her generation to break-free of the routine second-fiddle rut they were stuck in. Yes, she is surrounded by controversies, all the more so because she doesn’t allow people to corner her; when asked a question, she would not care to be politically correct. She isn’t flawless or faultless either, but she is by no means a people pleaser. Director Vikram Bhatt, in his article ‘The Dark Side of the Moon’ wrote, “People would think her as a propensity for committing professional hara-kiri. I would defer. In a place where everyone is careful not to step on toes for what it might do to their golden futures here is a girl who says, “Screw it”.”

She has simply refused to be anybody’s tenant. She owns the world she has created for herself.

At the risk of basking in the reflected glory, I remember some of my friends calling or texting me after watching her character in Queen to point out the resemblance, not only physical, but the way in which Rani comes of age and becomes her own person. For me and for every woman, that ought to be the biggest achievement.