A Bunch of Baloney

Earlier I was planning to write an article titled ‘Undomesticated’, because I had been told or it had been implied quite a few times recently that I was not raised (read ‘domesticated’) right, that my values are skewed (I chose to marry a man of a different religion, remember? and I had, for as long as I remember, decided that I will not be a part of a joint set-up, especially when privacy and peace is at stake)

As a few days passed, I decided to shelve ‘Undomesticated’, in favor of something bright and less “gharelu”, but, then, how can you be a writer if you cannot find something to rue.

I am someone who is known to be opinionated, verbose about the things that ruffle the feathers of my mind. But, lately, I have chosen to be quiet and not say anything which will fetch me labels along the lines of feminism, anti-nationalism and a whole lot of frequently and conveniently tossed-around-‘isms’, to the point that I have almost become anti-social. And it is not because I wish to be politically correct or something, but simply because I am tired of all the drama that ensues whenever I open my mouth to say something which defies convention so much so that I had a nervous breakdown in early December (I do not know the technical definition of ‘Nervous Breakdown’, but I believe what I experienced was a sister concern of that).

You are not a sikh enough if you do not cohabit with a sikh, you are not chaste enough if you step out of your “daayra” to follow your dreams or wear a dress that doesn’t cover your ankles or worse still, your knees. You are not a daughter-in-law enough if you do not touch the feet of your in-laws, you are not a nationalist enough if you dare mention the names of Gurmehr Kaur or Zaira Wasim or wait-for-it, Fawad Khan. You are not rightist enough if you do not say something against your warring neighbor. You are not American enough if you are brown, black, latin, homosexual, transgender, feminist, immigrant and a lot more. Basically, it’s all a Bunch of Baloney, a term that I have learnt from Mr. Gregory H., the Wimpy Kid.

Personally, a sense of nihilism has started to set in, which simply means that I belong to no race or religion and no religion owns me, that nothing in the world has real existence, but till the time we are alive, we have the right to speak and put across, of course peacefully, what our heart feels. That is perhaps why Faiz Ahmed Faiz’s lines which, of late, keep ringing in my ears are quote-worthy…

“Bol, yeh thoda waqt bahut hai,

Jism-o-zubaan ki maut se pehle;

Bol, ke sach zinda hai ab tak –

Bol, jo kuchh kehna hai keh le!”

(“Speak, this little time is plenty,

Before the death of body and tongue;

Speak, for truth is still alive –

Speak, say whatever is to be said.”)